I Scare Small Children

by POPSIE 1956

As I have mentioned numerous times, I adore my grandsons.

Chris and Zach in particular, have what I think is a unique bond with me, they know Popsie ain’t right, and we always have fun together.

I’m sure their younger brother Mason, in time, will join the group when he’s ready.

For now, however, and it happens all the time, very shortly after he sees me, he starts screaming like a banshee, thinking he’s seen the Boogeyman, or even the Devil himself!

After all these years, I just can’t figure it out.

I consider myself a nice guy, I love kids, pets, and the little baby Jesus.

Yet when it comes to these three boys, at a young stage in their life they would act like I’m some kind of an ax murderer.

This has caused great discussion in my family, and tremendous laughter from my daughter Megan.

I’ll use Mason as a recent example.

When he sees me, at first, he gives me a big smile, either of recognition, or he’s just passing gas.

In less, than a minute, he gets “the face”, the lower lip start quivering, he starts shaking, then here come the tears and screaming.

I walk away and he’s comforted by his mother, as the visit progresses we both seem to be OK.

I don’t get it.

When Chris and Zach were Mason’s age, they did the same, but they grew out of it, and I’m sure Mason will follow suit.

But it causes me to think about what I’m doing, or NOT doing, that brings about this reaction.

It’s been suggested, with Chris and Zach, that my voice has something to do with it.

Blame that on 40 years as a professional broadcaster, and 58 years as a big mouth obnoxious jerk.

But with Mason, I’ve tried to not even speak, just offering something as friendly as a warm smile.

Perhaps he’s not impressed with my lifetime of poor dental hygiene.

One guess has been it’s from the glasses I wear.

Maybe, but his parents both wear glasses, and he’s looked in a mirror before, so he knows what his reflection looks like.

Frankly, I’m stumped.

I guess I’ll just stay in another room until he’s 18.